Is Community Service the Same as Loving Your Neighbor?

“We are racist.” The words came out as both realization and confession. Courtney was reacting to a conversation I was facilitating about her congregation’s community service program. Most of the neighbors who lived near the church facility were Latine and worked in the fields. Most members of the congregation were white and worked in the aerospace industry. Their main community service was a weekly hot meal served by members and hosted in their fellowship hall. The team told me all about the care they take to decorate the tables and how well they treated their guests. After painting such a lovely picture, they wondered why “those people” never joined them for worship. Jerry noted that “it’s probably a good thing. I mean if they came, we’d have to change…add Spanish language and stuff.” Mildred agreed and added, “Besides, they’re poor; we can’t afford a congregation full of them.”

That’s when Courtney made her confession. The group defended themselves: they were sure they were not racist. I thanked them for their honesty and pointed out that their conversation revealed exactly where our work together needed to begin.

Love Your Neighbor: What Does It Really Mean?

Jesus taught that to “love your neighbor” is intricately linked to our love for God (Mt. 22:37-40 NRSV). Courtney’s congregation lived Jesus’ teaching by serving their hungry neighbors. Most ELCA congregations participate in some form of community service, and this work is absolutely necessary. Yet, love can’t be reduced to service.

The Motivation Behind Community Service

To continue the conversation, I asked Courtney’s team to tell me what motivated them to serve their neighbors. They spoke of their privilege, of having more than enough. It sounded like they felt a bit guilty. The line of reasoning went something like this: We have so much more than they do. We have what they need, so it’s only right that we should share. There was a clear power difference between the “we” who have the food and the “they” who don’t.

Is Service Motivated by Love?

Neither this congregation nor this conversation is unique. We serve, but can we honestly say that our motivation is love? Certainly, it’s possible in the broadest sense of the word to say that we love EVERYONE.

But shouldn’t love level the balance of power between “us” and “them?” When love motivates their actions, I hear people talk about their service as motivated by justice. They say things like, “It isn’t fair that our neighbors work hard in the fields, but don’t have enough to eat.” I hear about how members partner with community agencies to get better wages for the people who pick the food we all eat. Stuff like that. I didn’t hear any of that this time, not yet.

The Difference Between Service and Love

Here’s the point: community service can be anonymous, but loving our neighbors can’t. We can smile at the folks in the food line as we serve up their mashed potatoes, but to love folks, we need to get to know each other. In 1962, The Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. gave a speech in response to the question, “Are we making any real progress in the area of race relations?” He included this nugget:

I am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. They fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other.

Separation begets fear, which feeds hate. Communication is the solution. Talking to one another, listening to one another—this is the way of love.

Turning Community Service Into Love

Courtney’s congregation began the work of expanding their sense of service by falling in love with their neighbors. They talked to the folks in their community service program and heard stories about how their children were struggling in school. This led them to partner with a tutoring program for the elementary school next door. Jerry signed up and started working with a pair of Latino brothers. They got to know each other, maybe even to love each other. Now Jerry’s earlier comment about needing to “add Spanish language and stuff” has a face. Now Jerry wants his new friends and their family to be comfortable in worship. Who knows where this will lead?

What About Your Congregation?

Community service can expand to a love for our neighbors—and when it does, it’s beautiful. What about your congregation? I’m sure you are doing the good and necessary work of serving your neighbors. What would it look like if you expanded service into love by getting to know your neighbors one by one?

FREE Workshop on ZOOM on October 22 and 29, 2024

Register now for our Neighbors Together: Building Relationships workshop! Just go to our home page and RSVP.

Neighbors Together

We also have a couple of free resources might be helpful; one is called "Becoming a Community Church" and the other is "Bias and Defense Mechanisms: Theory and Practice." Click the button to find them:

Free Resources